5 Steps to Elope and Have the Wedding of Your Dreams- Stress Free & Romantic 🤎✨
Much like Carrie Bradshaw, I was a 40+ bride and, like Carrie, I use to dream about the big, extravaganza wedding with all the frills and whistles until reality set in. Weddings take ALOT of work, time, and, I wasn’t too sure it was worth it. Now, don’t get me wrong, I was beyond ecstatic about being engaged to the love of my life and, planning our happily ever after but, the idea of planning, debating, strategizing for the next year and half about every single detail of this one day, was not on our bucket list of things to do. And, lets not even mention the COST!
So, after very little debate and thought, we decided to elope. But, how!?
On Thanksgiving 2024, we agreed we wanted to elope on the anniversary of our engagement, which was 12/20/2024. With the upcoming “administration” we were unsure of how marriage equality would be affected and we were just ready to be married. That meant we had a little over 30 days to put together our, “I do,” our way. How you ask? With a strong google and mood board game and the Holy Spirit! We made it and you can too!
If you’re debating or have decided to elope, here’s my five steps on how to do so and ensure you’re eloping, your way!
1. Choose Your Dream Location 🌍💫
1. Choose Your Dream Location 🌍💫
Eloping deserves some of the same planning, intention, intimacy and crafting energy that planning a full wedding does. This is a declaration of your love story and showcasing this in an intimate manner can excite you like a big wedding, if not more. One of the best ways to achieve this is by picking a location that is meant to be the backdrop to your fairy tale. The best part is that you can get married ANYWHERE! From the top of an enchanting mountain top, a charming city hall, or a tropical beach at sunset, the world is your oyster. Consider the season and best traveling deals, if you’re going to be traveling for your nuptials.
Keeping it local?
Honestly, we initially had planned to get married at city hall. It seemed the most convenient but, destiny had other plans. The city hall dates in Manhattan go quickly and the release schedule was hard to track. It was giving trying to grab Cowboy Carter tickets. Needless to say, we ended up missing our non-negotiable date. Needing a venue space for under 2 hours in NYC is a hard task in less than 30 days. We looked at local art gallery spaces, and even considered popping up and having an elopement heist at The MET . Photos were a primary focus for me. In effort to do the most, I suggested and my wife to be agreed, to elope in the front of the NYC Library on 5th avenue in the middle of winter. It was worth it! ✨It literally snowed and rained on our day and it was under 20 degrees, but, the show must go on!
What can I say, she loves me and the visuals captured by Saints Vision were breathtaking.
Pro Eloping Tip
Consider the season and travel logistics. Some locations require permits and consider the weather.
2. Set a Date and Make It Official 📅✔️
2. Set a Date and Make It Official 📅✔️
Before you get too excited and engulfed in curating your elopement experience, you have to take care of business first. Research the marriage laws in your chosen location and ensure you have the right paperwork, witnesses( if required), and officiant.
Securing the right officiant was a must for us. We had to have someone who had the right energy. Once the city hall ceremony fell through, I went on a hunt for our officiant and found Rev. Clarice from Pure Timeless Unions.
After our first consultation, we knew that Pure Timeless Unions was meant to be our officiant. The way that they gathered our love story and incorporated it in our wedding script was perfection. It’s important that whoever you hire to be apart of your big day understand how important it is. Pure Timeless Unions also takes on the responsibility of mailing in your marriage certificate to get it certified after the ceremony which was a big help!
Pro Eloping Tip
Consider having an officiant who is culturally compentent and aware of certain traditions you’d like to adhere to like jumping the broom or supporting LGBTQIA+ unions.
3. Personalize Your Ceremony 💍❤️
3. Personalize Your Ceremony 💍❤️
Just because you’re eloping doesn’t mean you can’t add a little frill and have all the special touches. Writing your personal vows, wearing your dream attire, playing your favorite song will bring elements that make the day feel uniquely yours!
Pro Eloping Tip
Hiring a professional photographer or videographer to capture the moment is a must! Even considering having a release watch party with family and friends when you get the photos to include them in the moment.
I believe that elements really curate the experience and that is exactly how I intended to customize our “I do.” Starting with attire. We are both really into fashion and have similar taste but, uniquely our own. Our theme was “Budget-friendly Glam.” For my wife, she decided on a Draped Dress with Cascade from Eloquii’s Bridal collection. See it here. Did I mention it was under $200!?
I decided on a Pleated midi dress from Azazie, which gave me old Hollywood vibes and, the dress has pockets! WINNING! And, was under $150.. Double WINNING! We both finished our looks with faux fur stoles from Eloquii. Complete outfit breakdown and links can be found here.
Another way we personalized the experience was with out bouquets. To complete our looks, artist and floral extraordinaire, Gary Higgins, provided us with the customized bouquets made from the local floral market. We wanted jewel tones to bring a bit more sunshine to the day and they did! We even added in small bouquets for our witnesses( Latoya’s mom and my Best friend, Laing, and our singer, Chris.)
To give a unforgettable ceremonial moment, we had a professional singer start the ceremony with a song that was special for us both. It was the cherry on top of a sundae. Perfection!
4. Plan Your Celebration-Big or Small 🥂🎉
4. Plan Your Celebration-Big or Small 🥂🎉
Eloping doesn’t mean skipping the celebration! Having a romantic for two or with your small wedding part is always an option. Or, maybe you want to throw a reception party later to celebrate with your closest friends and family. Do it! The best part? Little to no drama with seating charts or the wrong dinner entree received- just love and good vibes!
After our elopement ceremony, we went home, threw on some sweats and went to dinner with our small crew. We also made some calls to our elders and let them know the big news, especially since the majority of our family is in North Carolina and we are in New York. We also plan to have a reception celebration in the summer to look forward to. To announce our nupitals on social media, I had a newspaper made announcing our, “ Remember the Date,” with a template I made in Canva and printed it off at Staples for under $10, Super cute way to celebrate this occasion.
5. Live In the Moment ✈️🌅
5. Live In the Moment ✈️🌅
Turn your elopement into an unforgettable adventure! Book a spa date after your elopement, go on a fun scravenger hunt, have date night at the place of your first date and have a photshoot, or plan a dreamy honeymoon. The possibilities are endless and you both can spend the energy(and money) you saved from not planning a big wedding and fully celebrating building your life together.
This is your moment- Make it magical
Pro Eloping Tip
Treat yourself! to a luxury stay, a private catered candle light dinner, or an adventure on a tropical island. After the elopement, continue to celebrate your love!
Final Thoughts: Eloping Is About YOU! 🤎
Final Thoughts: Eloping Is About YOU! 🤎
Eloping isn’t about skipping tradition- it’s about redefining it in a way that feels right for you and your partner. If the idea of a stress-free, personalized wedding speaks to your spirit and heart, do it! Honoring your love and union is the only thing that truly matters, and how you choose to celebrate it is entirely up to you.
Would you consider eloping or have you? Share your thoughts in the comments! ✨💍
